Sunday Solitude
How are you faring? I want to write something you will enjoy reading today. My goal is to get you thinking about what you can glean from this terrible season of betrayal.
No matter what God you serve (or if you choose not to believe in God), this is a time when you might be looking for relief. I know I am. I have meditated; I have prayed. I have been reading, studying, walking, stretching, and finally, writing. I still feel anxious and uncertain. I know that I am not alone in this, but I am physically alone, except for Luna the pit bull, each and every day. No one to hold my hand or comfort me when I cry--it's so difficult sometimes. Some days my only goal is to keep living. Some days I have to turn off the news and social media, and just try to see what is going on in my head.
When I took this picture, there was a special feeling about it. People were just out to see the sunrise. We were a grouping of solitudes. Families were together, but not really talking. Couples were simply drinking in the early-morning atmosphere, not speaking. Here I am now, feeling trapped and uncertain of the future, but I look at this photo and I know that I made it from there to here.
I can make it from here to what is next, if I persevere.
My faith provides relief, but generally, it takes a while for it to kick in. These times call for even greater faith. Things that were merely irritating six months ago have had six months to become intractable, unsolvable life issues. The amount of time you could spend solving these issues does not make a shred of difference.
It is difficult to stay positive these days. No one knows what is ahead. The people in charge do not seem concerned with our well-being. There is so much to be apprehensive over; so many things to worry about. We all need solutions, but the cacophony of failed leadership, determined protesting, and a stream of grift and lies from those we should be able to trust are what we have right now. I don't know where to find relief. Whenever I am stumped, I study what is bothering me, or what I want. That is how I undertook a contemplation of the word 'relief.'
"Removal or lightening of something oppressive, painful, or distressing."
The things that bring us relief seem truly tenuous right now. We are forced to look within; we must look to ourselves for reassurance. When that person, herb, drink, or other diversion is no longer efficacious, there is only oneself.
Dig deep and refuse to be intimidated by appearances or circumstances.
Right now, there isn't much release from anxiety or stress to be had. Personally, this has been a time to rediscover what it is I am capable of. I have ideas about what I am good at; competence is a different arena. I am good at survival. Thriving and building generational wealth have escaped my grasp, at least until now. We do not know what we do not know, so I have undertaken to understand precisely what would relieve me, here and now, in the midst of all this uncertainty and violence, and collapse of civility and social norms. Money is always good. An end to the ineptitude at the top would be most welcome. We have been factionalized into common sense versus extreme liberty. There will be a reckoning. This state of affairs is unsustainable.
Let there be peace within, and let it begin with me.
I took this photo from a moving vehicle. It was my cousin Jonathan's wedding day. I was enchanted. This looks like paradise to me. Running water would be my only must-have. This is my idea of solitude. In reality, I'd need some internet too, but I could cheerfully forego television. I only watch the news now, because it feels wrong to enjoy tv right now--like everything's okay, when assuredly things are not okay at all.
The algorithm presented me with this audio of Paulo Coelho's "The Alchemist." I'd never heard of it, but I've listened to this 'abridged' version four or five times since last week. The archetypal concepts it covers have rippled through my dreams in a way I can feel, but not yet recall upon awakening. I know I have been calmer and more motivated, so I'll leave it here for you now.
I want this blog to live and breathe, so posts like this will flower and grow.
Worthy comments welcome.
Comments
Post a Comment